K-Paul’s Louisiana Kitchen: A Tribute

To say that I have an obsession with New Orleans is a bit of an understatement. It is the middle of the freezing winter here in New York City, and as I write this, I’m looking at a mud room of my Brooklyn apartment adorned in New Orleans decor and design. While there are upwards of hundreds of reasons why I love the Big Easy, not least of all of them is the food. I’ve created my own personal series dedicated to a list of places in New Orleans. First, we will be talking about K-Paul’s Louisiana Kitchen. For someone who visits yearly, I feel like I’m almost obligated to create this list. 

Disclaimer, I have NOT VISITED EVERY RESTAURANT IN THE CITY! So, as the saying goes, please do not “at me” if your personal temple of food porn worship did not make it onto my list of my top ten favorite places to eat in New Orleans.  

New Orleans is the only place that is acceptable to venture to purely because of the cuisine. I’ve loved EVERY single meal that I’ve devoured. However, there are some eateries that I love as dearly as a relative. I dream about these places. I salivate like a Pavlovian pooch when I think of them. I’m frighteningly close to rolling up a sleeping bag and trying to move into these restaurants as my permanent place of residence. 

K Paul’s Kitchen: NOW CLOSED.

Unfortunately, as I update this post, I must inform my readers that my beloved K-Paul’s Louisiana kitchen has closed its doors permanently because of the COVID19 pandemic. However, I think it’s still acceptable to pay tribute to a really awesome place. And, who knows? Perhaps one day it will open its doors again to welcome us all. 

Fewer names are more synonymous with Louisiana cooking than Paul Prudhomme. If your mind is drawing a blank, pick up a bottle of Magic Seasoning Blend out of your kitchen cabinet. See the guy on the front of the bottle? That’s him.  He served as executive chef at none other than Commander’s Palace and is rarely pictured without the wearing of his signature snap brim hat. Unfortunately for the world, he passed away in 2015. However, his long time talented associate, Chef Paul Miller has headed the operation for quite a while, procuring fresh and local ingredients for some of the best tasting dishes in New Orleans. I’ll take you on a delicious journey of my favorites at K-Paul’s Louisiana Kitchen. 

Turtle Soup and Lies.

I never thought that I would try turtle soup. After all, turtles are pretty friendly and adorable. However, deep diving into culture is important to me. It also helped that our waitress described the dish as being a lot like a cup of chili. I like chili.

The history of the dish is a tale as old as time. Like most good rustic dishes, turtle soup originated out of an abundance of product. Green snapping turtles populated the area where early American colonists settled. In my case of eating it, the meat came ground and served in a dark brown roux. This made it palatable as opposed to trying to down giant chunks of mystery meat.

The soup had a “game-y” consistency and a oceanic taste, similar to gator or frog legs. Had no one told me that I was eating turtle, I could have cleared the entire cup. It truly was delicious and a lot like a savory, bold chili, as our waitress described. However, knowing that the animal I was eating has such an endearing personality – at least in cartoons – made it hard to swallow. I tried to be ethical and not waste food by passing the cup around the table and giving the family a taste. I was not ethical in telling them it was “delicious and they must try,” when I really thought it was a difficult meal emotionally. 

The fact that Mitch McConnell is an actual turtle could be the motivation or lack of motivation that you need to power through this appetizer. 

K Paul’s green onion dressing will have even the most reluctant of folks interested in salad again.

The creaminess of ranch dressing meets the tangy flavor of scallions to create the most perfect condiment known to human. Once you eat this, there will be no other dressing or dip that compares. I’m trying desperately to find the bottled version of this dressing. If you know where I can find one, help a sister out. I’m not above buying from the Black Market. 

A Terrible Comparison and My Death Row Meal.

I love crab claws. So does my mom. She loves them more than any of her family members, including me, and she’s told me that. As much as I personally love crab claws, I hate the amount of work I need to do to get to the meat. I’m willing to eat a lot, I’m not willing to exercise to get my food.

I’m not a hunter gatherer, and this is not the stone age – I shouldn’t have to do that shit. Enter solution: fried crab fingers. The hard work of de-shelling was done for me, and instead the meat was battered and fried in a creamy and breaded filling. To some this upcoming statement may be sacrilegious, but I can best describe these delectable bites as an elevated seafood take on the hush-puppy. Fresh, delicious crab without the pain in the ass work, and added benefit of lightly fried and battered goodness made this an outstanding appetizer. The creamy sriracha sauce served on the side made for a great accompaniment. 

I have five death row meals; this next dish is one of them.

Paneed veal with lobster herbal brie cream was my entree of the evening. If you haven’t been able to tell, I do really well with creamy consistencies. The savory melt of brie cheese and heavy cream leaking onto a mountain of mashed potatoes is my idea of heaven. The veal (also covered in the cream and brie) was perfectly seasoned, and the combination of all of the above with lobster and herbs is worth killing for because you’d essentially be killing in order to get to the meal, and then you’d be on death row for killing someone, and you get to have it again.

New Orleans Is Haunted. Straight Up.

I felt a bit dizzy during dinner and went to the women’s restroom on the second floor (where we were seated) to splash some water on my face. I went into the stall and did not see anyone enter from under the stall door, but was surprised when I heard someone’s feet shuffling. As I left the stall, I stopped in my tracks. A beautiful young woman was washing her hands almost obsessively in the sink.

She kept sighing and seemed as though she were looking for an “in” for conversation. I kept my eyes on my own hands, trying to mind my business. After all, I’m a New Yorker. “I cut my hand,” she said. Despite my better judgement, I looked into her sink expecting to see a small cut, and instead saw a giant gash across her palm. Concern consumed me, and being a good person deep down, I responded with, “Oh wow, you should put pressure on that.” She continued washing and washing while staring at me and grinning. “My boyfriend thinks I’m crazy. I grabbed the glass too hard.” I laughed in a small way and went to get a paper towel. She repeated the sentiment about her boyfriend twice. 

When I returned to the table, I told my family about the encounter.

We eagerly anticipated her coming out. Every so often we looked up at the door to see if we could catch her leaving. But no one ever left from what we could see. I looked around the dining room throughout dinner trying to find the woman. The dining room was small, and only people who dined on the 2nd floor would use that bathroom in which we met, so I don’t believe she came from the first floor. I even went back into the restroom afraid that perhaps she fainted. But there was no one in there. I never saw her again. I even looked around on the first floor as we left, but she was nowhere to be found.

I’d been wanting to visit K-Paul’s Louisiana Kitchen for years, and in November of 2019 I finally got to dine there. As the saying goes, timing is everything: A few short months later, the restaurant was closed. I’m so grateful for the exceptional staff who turned our night of eating into a true experience. It was so evident that the staff was a family and they made us feel like family. They all lined up at the exit to wave goodbye to us, and one young man even said, “Happy we had you here with our K-Paul’s Family.” I hope they all fared alright. If you visit K-Paul’s website, you’ll be able to see that you can buy memorabilia from the restaurant including ladles, copper pans, hand written menus, art, and more. Don’t miss your chance to grab a piece of history!